Golf Quotes
Published by MIC GmbH on Friday, December 29, 2006 at 2:04 AM.
GREAT GOLF QUOTES
Sayings that put a perspective on the game we love!
Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. ~Grantland Rice
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. ~ George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. ~ Author Unknown
Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike
It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. ~Robert Lynd
If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson
They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. ~Gardner Dickinson
If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth
Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five. ~ Paul Harvey
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. ~Jack Benny
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards? ~ Al Boliska
Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.~ Ben Hogan
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~ Jack Lemmon
It is good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. ~ Mark Twain
Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose. ~ Woodrow Wilson
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up. ~Tommy Bolt
Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one. ~Author Unknown
I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced.
~Author Unknown
I have spent most of my life golfing ..... the rest I have just wasted. ~ Author Unknown
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top. ~ Pete Dye
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~ Jim Bishop
I am hitting the woods just great ..... but having a terrible time getting out of them! ~ Author Unknown
I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. ~ President Gerald Ford
My handicap? Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top. ~Pete Dye
I'm hitting the woods just great ....but having a terrible time getting out of them! ~Author Unknown
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. ~Billy Graham
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
~Jack Lemmon
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. ~Mark Twain
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon
Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.
~Jimmy DeMaret
May thy ball lie in green pastures .... and not in still waters. ~Author Unknown
If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle. ~Author Unknown
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. ~George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. ~Author
John – here is a book that belongs in your golf librabry www.swingofchampions.com Just sign up here and go get a Free golf Joke Book!
Sayings that put a perspective on the game we love!
Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. ~Grantland Rice
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. ~ George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. ~ Author Unknown
Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike
It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. ~Robert Lynd
If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson
They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. ~Gardner Dickinson
If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth
Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five. ~ Paul Harvey
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. ~Jack Benny
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards? ~ Al Boliska
Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.~ Ben Hogan
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~ Jack Lemmon
It is good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. ~ Mark Twain
Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose. ~ Woodrow Wilson
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up. ~Tommy Bolt
Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one. ~Author Unknown
I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced.
~Author Unknown
I have spent most of my life golfing ..... the rest I have just wasted. ~ Author Unknown
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top. ~ Pete Dye
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~ Jim Bishop
I am hitting the woods just great ..... but having a terrible time getting out of them! ~ Author Unknown
I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. ~ President Gerald Ford
My handicap? Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top. ~Pete Dye
I'm hitting the woods just great ....but having a terrible time getting out of them! ~Author Unknown
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. ~Billy Graham
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
~Jack Lemmon
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. ~Mark Twain
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon
Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.
~Jimmy DeMaret
May thy ball lie in green pastures .... and not in still waters. ~Author Unknown
If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle. ~Author Unknown
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. ~George Deukmejian
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. ~Author
John – here is a book that belongs in your golf librabry www.swingofchampions.com Just sign up here and go get a Free golf Joke Book!
